Dido reflects on cats and people

People are strange - give me a darn good feline anyday (preferably Ringo).

Take people. To begin with they don't have much fur. Never trust a creature without fur I say. No fur? Grrrrrrrrrr. How can you trust smooth furless skin? People talk of smooth talkers, but we felines talk of smooth skinners. Hmmm I just realised that living with the firegeni is teaching me compromise; I am learning to tolerate furlessness - it's a price I have to pay for this relationship.

Listen to this! Humans actually SHAVE off any fur they have, even a suspicion of it. Or they peel it off. Erm...judging by the wails produced in some quarters while the process of "defurestation" occurs, take it from me, it's very painful. The yowls and screams would make any cat - even a big brave one like me - flee with terror. I have decided that any creature that shaves off their God-given fur needs to be institutionalised and taught the benefits of fur. All except the few whose furlessness I am learning to accept. (The demands that love makes on one are exhausting.)

Humans are even funnier. They not only shave off what they are supposed to have, they use what they do not have. Have you ever seen a human with claws and fangs for instance? (barring vampires I mean and they aren't strictly "human" - no really they aren't). Well believe me humans use them very efficiently, even there are none visible, and the damage they do is unbelievable.

Many humans also use nonretractable metaphoric "nails" to inflict lasting psychological damage. This is, strangely, on the humans closest to them. An indifferent scratch here and a deliberate rip there in the fabric of human vulnerability, and within a year you have a shredded human. A careless cruel word here and a bit of sarcasm and snideness there, and one is well on the way to pulverised human psyche.

Frankly the damage humans do to one another would make a decent cat blush. We cats don't spend time being catty (and while we are about it - bitches aren't really bitchy). Humans eat each other up - literally, and smack their lips after it too.

Ask me why I prefer a leopard or tiger anyday? Go on ask me.

It's becuase we sagged pe pellet standard felines do a darn good job of many things. We cuddle like experts, we are deeply philosophical (as you would have noticed), we are very good at washing people (sluuurrrrrp, slllll sllllll slllurp) and cheering them up.

And we are pretty good at loving the fur - oops I mean skin (sigh) off the humans we own.